The Loneliest Alpha (The MacKellen Alphas) Read online

  “Who are you?”

  The woman scowled, the act making her face scrunch. It looked cute on her. “I’m Kaity, Gavin’s younger sister. Hanna, my older sister, is on the way. I already called her.”

  Alicia took a step back. “What do you want?”

  Kaity held up her hands. “Just came to make sure you’re all right. Gonna bring some food up soon. Can I get you a book, a deck of cards or something to kill time with? I know I’d be going stir crazy up here by myself.”

  Alicia sucked in a breath. A tingling sensation formed in her chest and her belly fluttered. “Can you get me out of here? Just get me to the property line and I’ll run, please!” She rushed toward the young girl, desperate.

  “Whoa, there. I can’t do that. Gavin would have me raked over hot coals. Listen, I know this stinks but we weren’t expecting you in the first place, and I just heard about this. That’s why I’m here actually. Came over to give Gavin a little piece of my mind.” She laughed ruefully. “He has a way of making you see things from a different perspective, you know?”

  “No, I don’t know.” Alicia ground her teeth. She spotted the key clenched in Kaity’s little fist. She had to be about twenty-four-years old. She debated whether she could take her in a fight. Probably.

  The girl flushed. “Yes, well, what did you think of him?”

  Alicia’s gaze narrowed. “Excuse me?”

  Kaity rocked on her feet, unable to hold Alicia’s glare. “I mean, just what did you think of him? Gavin?”

  Alicia straightened her back. “You want to know what I think of the man who’s practically kidnapped me? Who has blindfolded me, tied me up and stuffed me into a dark room to interrogate me? Who possibly wants to mate with me?” The girl’s face grew white as a sheet. “You want to know what I think about him? Well, let’s just say none of it’s good.”

  Alicia twitched at her own lie. Some of it wasn’t bad. He had an interesting voice and he did have a sort of genuine quality to him. He hadn’t actually hurt her. She had no bruises or anything. She had been left alone all night. No one came and molested her. The night ended…rather boring really.

  At the insult to her brother and alpha, the girl stiffened. “I didn’t know he did any of that but I’d bet my college tuition you weren’t hurt, were you? That you were probably treated kind of nice, considering.” She paused, waiting. “So, am I right?”

  Alicia refused to answer that, not even by a nod.

  She smirked. “See, I’m right. Gavin would never hurt a woman. He won’t hurt anyone unless it’s really deserving and even then…” her words trailed off and a pained look came to her eyes. She shook her head as if to get rid of the thought. “Listen, my older sister Hanna will be here soon. What do you want for breakfast in the meantime?”

  Instead of answering, Alicia fixed the girl with her own question. “What’s wrong with his face?”

  Kaity flinched as if she’d been struck. Then her face burned red and anger blazed in her eyes. “Nothing’s fucking wrong with his face! You’re no better than the rest of them!” Alicia actually took a step back, ready for the girl to swing at her.

  Kaity spun around and left, slamming the door behind her, the wood cracking in the frame. The lock turned and that was it.

  Alicia went back to the window, her mind working a mile a minute. She’d insulted the girl. She hadn’t really meant to though she could have said things nicer. Who was the rest of ‘them’ and why did Alicia feel like a sack of garbage at being compared to them?

  She didn’t like that. She didn’t like that one bit.

  But why should she feel like the bad guy? She wasn’t here of her own volition. Her alpha and Gavin forced her into this.

  All because of my stupid mouth.

  Her inability to keep quiet in the face of injustice usually worked out well. In this case both she and Sarah were victims.

  About an hour later the other sister came. This one didn’t bother to introduce herself. She opened the door, slid a tray of food against the wall, then slipped back out. Alicia had her features memorized though. She had dark blonde hair, not as light as Kaity’s and a full, rounder figure, curvaceous. Her hair was longer too, but straight. She didn’t bother to look at Alicia.

  Alicia ate and tried to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Just what did Gavin MacKellen look like?

  Why do you care so much?

  Because no sane person had a conversation in pitch black like that! It was beyond weird and she wanted to know why. Why all the games.

  The sisters both had blonde hair so she’d guess that he did as well. One had blue eyes and she didn’t get a look at Hanna’s but she’d bet they were about the same. Blond hair, blue eyes. He was tall and broad, looked like he worked for a living. Not a behind a desk kind of job, but on the land, hard work with his hands. A job that used muscles.

  She was out in the mountains. The land was rich and beautiful. The air even smelled fresh and clean like it was new. A part of her liked it, wanted to run out to those rolling hills and climb the mountains in the distance. She didn’t have scenery like that in Arizona where sunblock was mandatory for leaving the house.

  With rich land like this he could be a farmer. Maybe a work incident had busted his face up pretty badly or he’d been in a car accident. Lykaens didn’t heal well from major injuries like that even if they did live long lives. A chill ran down her arms. She didn’t know what she’d do if she had to live the rest of her life with a face she was ashamed of. She didn’t like to think she was that petty. She didn’t make a whole lot of fuss over her own face, but she knew it was pretty.

  What would she do if she lost that? If she had something so terrible she couldn’t stand to show it to a prospective mate?

  Alicia hung her head, weary. She was weakening. Actually wanting to hear him out, to see his face; maybe if she did all that he’d lose interest in her and she could go back home. Back to the design that would make her famous.

  She went back to her position at the window. The sun rose higher in the sky then descended into nightfall. Later in the afternoon another knock came at her door and Hanna slipped in another tray with food. Alicia was finishing her last bite when she heard the rumble of a truck.

  Excitement flashed through her veins and she ran back to the window, clinging to the rungs, her face pressed into the bars. She faced the side of the house away from the front that led up to the house so she couldn’t see much. But she could hear the door of a truck open and close, soft footsteps lead up to the house, then pause. Her heart fluttered. She just knew.

  It was him. He was back.

  Heavy steps beat against the front porch then the door opened. Alicia stepped back from the window and stared down at the ground as she focused all of her energy on listening. If she concentrated hard enough she heard a rumble of voices. A few minutes later the soft purr of an engine started and then the car took off.

  Her breaths came faster. This was it. The sisters were gone and the alpha was home, possibly even alone, unless his brother, Will, was here again.

  Bootsteps pounded up a staircase, the movement slow and tired sounding. Alicia’s muscle flexed and stiffened, ready for action, though she didn’t exactly know what. However, those heavy steps didn’t come her way but disappeared into another room. She heard the door close. A minute later a shower kicked on.

  Alicia ran to the window and tried pushing the bars again. She kicked at them but they didn’t budge at all. Running back to the door, she tried the handle. When that didn’t work she surveyed the door but it was sturdy and hard. No way could she kick that thing down.

  She was stuck in this room and he was coming for her.

  CHAPTER 4

  The hot water soothed his sore body but did nothing to ease the hollow ache in his heart.

  Little Emma was dead. A family was devastated.

  News would spread fast in the pack. By tomorrow everyone will know. Gavin toweled off and dressed, his movements slow like an old man�
��s. On top of that he had to deal with the girls the alpha’s sent him. All he wanted to do right now was climb into bed and maybe forget for a while, if he could even get to sleep that is.

  But she was down at the end of the hall. How was she today? Maybe he needed to get her a TV in there. That shitty old guest room didn’t even have a closet. A flush of embarrassment burned his face. He hadn’t updated his own house, never saw need to. Now he wished he had. She should be in something pretty like herself. Not his old shit house. He liked its old charm and aged beauty, but the pipes didn’t work like they used to and it needed a little work. Okay, a lot of work. He’d never bothered fixing things he could fix because he lived alone for all these years.

  Would she still be awake? Hell, he knew he would be if their roles were reversed. He took a seat on his bed, sighing heavily.

  He’d planned to get this done tonight. To go meet with all the girls and start eliminating ones he knew wouldn’t match with at all. Fuck, but he was bone tired. He’d have to do it tomorrow.

  He stood and pulled on a shirt. He never slept in one, but he wanted something else more than sleep right now.

  Fuck, don’t do it, Gavin.

  He scrubbed a coarse hand over his face, scratched the back of his head. Fuck.

  I’m gonna do it.

  Had to. Had to see her. No, no, couldn’t see her. She’d see his face. He’d have to get her into the study that he and Will had darkened just for these meetings. Couldn’t risk doing that by himself, she’d see him.

  He was a sick bastard for not wanting her to see his face. He knew what would happen then. She’d run screaming and crying. She’d beg to go back to her alpha and plead with him not to send her back to Gavin. God, he didn’t think he could stand it. That’s why he had to things this way. He had to get to know her first. Had to try to show her his good qualities.

  And what were they? said a bitter voice.

  He had to have some, but he couldn’t think of any. He needed hope to help him get through this. Hope and some faith. He needed to get to know these ladies first, let them get to know him, then he’d show them his face.

  Show her what she’d have to look at for the rest of her life.

  Shaking his head, he stood. He shouldn’t do it, but damn, after the day he had, he craved a little pretty. Something nice and kind of sweet. She had all that in her. He could see it in her eyes. But there was so much more too. Strength and guts. Yeah, he appreciated that.

  He stood in front of her door though he didn’t remember taking himself there. With a long day on his shoulders and not much food in him, he really wasn’t in the right place to do this.

  Fuck. He was still gonna do it.

  He knocked.

  He didn’t hear any shuffling, any gasps of surprise, nothing. But she was in there. He didn’t know how to explain it, he just knew. This meant she’d heard him coming and had been waiting. Great. She probably thought he was a creep.

  His fist was raised to knock again when she spoke. “What do you want?” Her voice was strong and hard.

  He grimaced and took a step back, then another until he leaned against the hallway wall. What did he say now? Hello, how are you? He had the girl locked in a room she sure as shit didn’t want to be in. It’s not like she was going to warm to him any time quick, if at all.

  Quiet footsteps crept toward the door. He could almost imagine her putting her ear to it and listening.

  He cleared his throat again. Didn’t make much of a difference; his voice still sounded like he’d had a truck run over his throat. “Just wanted to talk.”

  He stared at the white, chipped door. The wood was sturdy, he knew, it had come with the house and never been replaced. This was almost easier than looking at her. She distracted him, made longings surge in his chest with hope. Hopes of things he could never have.

  Then why are you even trying?

  He pushed the thought away, not wanting to think about it.

  “I don’t want to talk to you. Go away.”

  Sighing, he closed his eyes. Angry or not, he liked the sound of her voice. So feminine and pretty. Not like his. She wasn’t anything like him. Maybe that’s what he liked about her.

  “A little girl was murdered. She was found this morning.” The words started coming out. He hadn’t planned on saying them. But the dark hallway and old white door towering before him almost made it seem like a confession. Like he could let out all his fears and sins to this door and his soul would be cleansed.

  “What?” she asked, her voice much softer now.

  “Emma Linchman. Good girl. Her parents weren’t so good to her but they loved her anyway, I suppose. She was found beaten to death. She was a kid.”

  A soft sigh sounded, traveling through the door to his ears. The muscles in his back relaxed at the sound. “How old was she?”

  “Only twelve. Someone beat her, beat her little head in. I keep wonderin’ if I could have done something.”

  A moment of silence passed. “What would you have done?”

  Air gushed from his clenched lips. “Put on extra guards, guarded her myself. No one would have touched her.”

  “You can’t predict when someone’s going to get hurt.”

  “It happened on my watch.”

  He heard her move, sounded like she sat against the wall. “What happens next? Do you know who did it?”

  “No, not yet. My brother Hart’s a cop, works with the humans. He’s going to do an investigation privately with some of his cop friends. He’ll figure out who did it. Then it’ll be pack justice.”

  “Good,” she said.

  “Yeah,” he agreed.

  They fell into silence again. A calming silence that relaxed his muscles and brought the heavy blanket of drowsiness that much closer.

  “What do you do?”

  The gently whispered question teased his ears. His eyes popped open. She wanted to know about him?

  “Build houses for the pack, some handy work too, things like that.”

  “Oh, I figured as much.”

  His brow raised at that and even he took a look around his rundown house. It had character but that was about all it had. “How so?”

  “Just did. How’s Sarah?”

  His mind raced to figure who Sarah was since the name didn’t ring a bell. Then it clicked. That was the other girl Alpha Josiah from Arizona sent up. How was she? He had no clue but she was safe at his sister’s house. “She’s safe, comfortable.”

  “Where is she?” she asked, her voice getting stern.

  He sighed; it sounded like their nice playtime was over. “She’s at Hanna’s house.”

  He heard her head thump against the wall. “Can I ask you something?”

  His stomach muscles tensed. Nerves. God, she made him nervous and they weren’t even having a normal conversation, face-to-face. It felt like being a kid again and having the attention of the pretty girl in class. His palms sweated.

  “Yeah?” Anything, he wanted to say, you can ask me anything.

  “Why won’t you let me see your face?”

  Cold icy fingers settled over his heart. He stood, his lips heavy and pulling down into a deep frown. “I already told you.” That’s it. Their little happy chat was over. He started away. He didn’t much feel like repeating the words, reminding her of what an ugly bastard he was. Not even for her.

  Her voice stopped him in his tracks. “I mean, I know what you said before but…I guess I’d just rather see who I was talking to than talking to a door or a dark shadow.”

  For a moment he considered unlocking that door and stepping into the room with all the lights on. Just letting her see his face and know what she was getting into. His fingers twitched and his chest ached with each breath.

  He stalked to the door and grabbed the door handle. He could do it right now. Get it over with. Show her what he looked like. Then he could see the disgust and shock on her face and be over with it. He could send her packing the next morning.

&nb
sp; But, no, he couldn’t do it. Couldn’t even bring himself to unlock the door. He backed up, sweat dripping down his back and his hands shaking. He didn’t want to ruin it. He didn’t want to lose her before he knew her. Not yet.

  He wanted that chance, no matter how impossible it was. He wanted the hope that if he made her fall in love with him then it wouldn’t matter how busted his face looked because she wouldn’t care. She could love him anyway.

  With a groan, he rubbed the throbbing ache over his heart. God, he craved it so badly his chest hurt.

  “Sorry, Alicia. I can’t do that.”

  He started walking away when her fist banged against the door. “Don’t leave me in here, Gavin MacKellen! Let me go!” The door shook and rattled as she thumped it.

  He braced himself. It took every ounce of willpower inside him not to go to her and free her like she asked. “I can’t. I’m sorry.”

  “Are you a monster? A freak? What the hell is wrong with you? Just let me out of here!”

  Her screams beat against his retreating back. He closed himself in his bedroom, breaths coming hard and fast. He had to sit down and get control of himself. When she broke down into tears, he had to force himself to leave the house. The sound tore him apart from the inside out. It made him want to run back to her room and show her everything, to let her see the monster he was, and then kiss her anyway.

  But she’ll never kiss you.

  Because she was right. He was a freak.

  CHAPTER 5

  Alicia stared out the window the next morning as Gavin left in his truck. She didn’t have to wait long until the soft purr of a car pulled up.

  Good, she thought, at least one of his sisters will be here.

  Alicia went back to the bed and sat, calm for what she was going to do next.

  She’d made her decision last night, had carefully planned it. Today she was getting out of here.

  It wouldn’t be easy. There would be guards to contend with among other variables she couldn’t begin to suspect, but she’d do it. She had determination and bit of crazy on her side to guide her.